1 00:00:01,496 --> 00:00:03,964 Yo, fellas, guess what I got. 2 00:00:03,998 --> 00:00:06,199 Two field passes to the Pittsburgh/Cleveland game! 3 00:00:06,234 --> 00:00:07,300 - No way! - Whoa! 4 00:00:07,335 --> 00:00:09,036 Unh! Don't touch! 5 00:00:09,070 --> 00:00:12,172 I just windexed these babies. You'll smudge the lamination. 6 00:00:12,206 --> 00:00:14,508 Me and a guest are gonna be watching the game 7 00:00:14,542 --> 00:00:18,011 from the sideline, drinking the same Gatorade as the players 8 00:00:18,046 --> 00:00:21,081 and sitting in front of one of those big-ass cool zone fans, 9 00:00:21,115 --> 00:00:22,849 just... 10 00:00:24,419 --> 00:00:25,919 I love that stadium! 11 00:00:25,953 --> 00:00:28,155 I was once a guest of Terry Bradshaw's. 12 00:00:28,189 --> 00:00:32,626 He gave me an all-access pass. And I gave him one, too. 13 00:00:34,162 --> 00:00:36,096 So, uh, how'd you score those? 14 00:00:36,130 --> 00:00:39,232 I sold this customer a sweet 3-D HD in-home theater. 15 00:00:39,267 --> 00:00:41,868 And he's so happy with it, he gave you the tickets. 16 00:00:41,903 --> 00:00:44,184 No, his wife was so pissed that he spent their vacation 17 00:00:44,185 --> 00:00:46,506 money on a TV, she was gonna cheat on him, and I told her, 18 00:00:46,541 --> 00:00:50,177 "hey, if you really want to get back at him, give me his field passes." 19 00:00:51,946 --> 00:00:54,181 Your wife cheating on you with a Canadian exterminator 20 00:00:54,215 --> 00:00:55,949 is a hurt you never recover from. 21 00:00:56,584 --> 00:00:59,086 I've revealed too much. 22 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:01,955 So, Roy, you're taking me, right? Your best friend. 23 00:01:02,189 --> 00:01:03,824 Wait a minute. I'm his best friend. 24 00:01:03,858 --> 00:01:06,393 - You're taking me, right? - Guys, stop fighting. 25 00:01:06,427 --> 00:01:07,928 We all know Roy's gonna take his wife. 26 00:01:12,934 --> 00:01:14,968 Well, you can take this guy out of the running, 27 00:01:15,002 --> 00:01:17,137 because I'm getting ready for my mom's birthday. 28 00:01:17,171 --> 00:01:18,405 Well, that's a shame. 29 00:01:18,439 --> 00:01:19,573 These passes are worth about a grand apiece. 30 00:01:19,607 --> 00:01:21,842 I was figuring I could take you and that 31 00:01:21,843 --> 00:01:24,077 would settle our whole bar-tab brouhaha. 32 00:01:24,112 --> 00:01:25,879 Oh, so it's called a brouhaha. 33 00:01:25,913 --> 00:01:27,581 I guess that makes sense ... I serve you a brew, 34 00:01:27,615 --> 00:01:30,450 I ask you to pay, and you say, "ha ha." 35 00:01:30,485 --> 00:01:32,452 So, it's me or Ahmed. Choose. 36 00:01:32,487 --> 00:01:34,020 Come on, Roy. 37 00:01:34,055 --> 00:01:35,622 If I had a functioning liver and you needed it, 38 00:01:35,656 --> 00:01:38,558 I'd give you half ... or... whatever part worked. 39 00:01:38,593 --> 00:01:40,060 Wait a minute. 40 00:01:40,094 --> 00:01:41,895 There's something you're not considering. 41 00:01:41,929 --> 00:01:44,464 If you'll permit me, I think what Owen is trying to say is, 42 00:01:44,499 --> 00:01:46,299 football is America's game. 43 00:01:46,334 --> 00:01:49,169 And Owen is American through and through. 44 00:01:49,203 --> 00:01:52,072 And so are you, Roy, but there are still a lot 45 00:01:52,073 --> 00:01:54,941 of lingering questions about this one over here. 46 00:01:54,976 --> 00:01:58,145 - I'm American, Hank. - So you keep claiming. 47 00:01:58,179 --> 00:02:01,327 If you take this guy, Roy, you're gonna miss the first 48 00:02:01,328 --> 00:02:04,417 quarter while a dog is sniffing him for powder residue. 49 00:02:06,682 --> 00:02:09,690 3x10 - Monkey Plate 50 00:02:10,091 --> 00:02:14,027 ♪ Da, da da da, da da da ♪ 51 00:02:14,061 --> 00:02:18,165 ♪ da, da da da, da da da ♪ 52 00:02:18,199 --> 00:02:22,235 ♪ da da da da, da da da, da da da ♪ 53 00:02:22,270 --> 00:02:28,041 ♪ da da da da, da da da, da da da, da da da, hey! ♪ 54 00:02:28,075 --> 00:02:30,944 I got the wine for mom's surprise birthday party. 55 00:02:30,978 --> 00:02:34,080 Steve, you own a bar. Why would you buy wine? 56 00:02:34,115 --> 00:02:36,950 It's a Korean rice wine. It's for my mom's Hwangap. 57 00:02:36,984 --> 00:02:39,618 Ohhhhhh. She has Hwangap? 58 00:02:40,121 --> 00:02:44,224 By law, she has to notify all her previous partners. 59 00:02:44,258 --> 00:02:46,560 No, Hwangap is a traditional Korean celebration 60 00:02:46,594 --> 00:02:49,629 the children give their parents for their 60th birthday party. 61 00:02:49,664 --> 00:02:52,232 We get Korean flowers, eat a special red-bean cake. 62 00:02:52,266 --> 00:02:54,367 Some people display a severed hog's head ... 63 00:02:54,402 --> 00:02:59,639 a little violent for us, so we're serving pigs in a blanket. 64 00:02:59,874 --> 00:03:02,442 So, who's RSVPed so far? 65 00:03:02,476 --> 00:03:04,644 Well, dad's side of the family said no, 66 00:03:04,678 --> 00:03:07,347 but they do want front-row seats to her funeral. 67 00:03:07,381 --> 00:03:09,716 - Anybody else? - Well, I can't invite 68 00:03:09,717 --> 00:03:12,680 mom's sister, Sook-Ja, because they hate each other. 69 00:03:12,715 --> 00:03:14,421 Right. That feud's been ugly for years. 70 00:03:14,455 --> 00:03:16,156 Yeah. 71 00:03:16,190 --> 00:03:18,591 Do you think the U.P.S. ever delivered that box of dog poop? 72 00:03:18,626 --> 00:03:20,894 I doubt it. There's an 80-pound limit. 73 00:03:20,928 --> 00:03:22,629 Huh. 74 00:03:22,663 --> 00:03:25,832 But I did invite Aunt Sook-Ja's daughter, Cousin Jenny. 75 00:03:25,866 --> 00:03:28,468 Steve, why would you do that? 76 00:03:28,502 --> 00:03:30,437 Well, because a Hwangap is all about family, 77 00:03:30,471 --> 00:03:32,205 and I really think we're missing out on something 78 00:03:32,239 --> 00:03:34,507 by not reaching out and connecting with our relatives. 79 00:03:34,542 --> 00:03:36,176 Don't you want them in our lives? 80 00:03:36,210 --> 00:03:37,544 Yeah. That would be incredible. 81 00:03:37,578 --> 00:03:39,646 But are you sure mom's gonna be okay with it? 82 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:41,748 Maybe we should run it past dad first. 83 00:03:41,782 --> 00:03:42,882 Run what past dad? 84 00:03:42,917 --> 00:03:44,617 Uh... We were talking about 85 00:03:44,652 --> 00:03:47,487 what shoulder my bar towel should be on. 86 00:03:47,521 --> 00:03:49,622 Well, if you wear it on your left, it means you're gay. 87 00:03:49,657 --> 00:03:51,691 Oh. Thanks, dad. 88 00:03:51,725 --> 00:03:53,560 - Yeah. - Thanks for what? 89 00:03:53,594 --> 00:03:55,929 Oh, uh, we were talking about 90 00:03:55,963 --> 00:03:58,364 what shoulder I should put my bar towel on. 91 00:03:58,399 --> 00:04:01,655 Well, if you wear it on the right, it means you're gay. 92 00:04:02,436 --> 00:04:04,871 - Dad said the left. - With your slender build, 93 00:04:04,905 --> 00:04:08,191 guys are gonna hit on you either way. 94 00:04:09,193 --> 00:04:10,694 Hey, good buddy, I got you a little gift, 95 00:04:10,728 --> 00:04:14,488 and it has nothing to do with that once-in-a-lifetime field pass. 96 00:04:14,523 --> 00:04:16,132 - Oh. - Since you got that promotion, 97 00:04:16,167 --> 00:04:18,468 I wanted to get you a pen that reflects such authority. 98 00:04:18,502 --> 00:04:21,471 - Did you rehearse that? - No, that's from my heart, asshole. 99 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:24,607 Ooh. A woman in a bikini. 100 00:04:24,642 --> 00:04:28,244 Turn it upside-down. Her bathing suit slides off. 101 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:30,613 - Ooh! - Ooh! 102 00:04:30,648 --> 00:04:34,250 - What's that? - Her dick. It's from Thailand. 103 00:04:34,285 --> 00:04:37,721 - I can't stop staring at it. - Come on, Ahmed. 104 00:04:37,755 --> 00:04:40,223 Trying to buy Roy's friendship so he'll take you to the game ... 105 00:04:40,257 --> 00:04:44,260 - that's shameless. - Yeah ... shameless. 106 00:04:44,295 --> 00:04:47,131 Hey, Roy, last night, I was writing in my friendship journal. 107 00:04:48,733 --> 00:04:52,469 And the entry, like many others, was all about us. 108 00:04:52,503 --> 00:04:57,240 It made me remember the moment when we first met. 109 00:04:58,709 --> 00:05:01,478 This one's for you, buddy. 110 00:05:05,516 --> 00:05:08,618 ♪ It was late at the arcade ♪ 111 00:05:10,321 --> 00:05:13,757 ♪ all my tokens were gone ♪ 112 00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:17,527 ♪ not a friend in sight ♪ 113 00:05:17,561 --> 00:05:21,598 ♪ not even Steve Sulli-von ♪ 114 00:05:21,632 --> 00:05:25,802 ♪ from behind the "NBA jam" machine ♪ 115 00:05:25,836 --> 00:05:29,596 ♪ came a boy who looked like Kareem ♪ 116 00:05:31,242 --> 00:05:32,475 It was Roy. 117 00:05:32,510 --> 00:05:38,148 ♪ you came with a handful of tokens ♪ 118 00:05:38,182 --> 00:05:41,551 ♪ and my heart became unbroken ♪ 119 00:05:41,585 --> 00:05:45,188 ♪ Roy, Roy, you're my token friend ♪ 120 00:05:45,222 --> 00:05:49,459 ♪ and you'll be that till the bitter end ♪ 121 00:05:49,493 --> 00:05:53,196 ♪ token friend ♪ ♪ token friend ♪ 122 00:05:53,230 --> 00:05:56,599 ♪ Roy, you're my ♪ 123 00:05:56,634 --> 00:06:00,617 ♪ token friend. ♪ 124 00:06:07,912 --> 00:06:10,346 Whoa. This is kind of a weak turnout for mom's party. 125 00:06:10,381 --> 00:06:11,614 We need more people. 126 00:06:11,649 --> 00:06:13,316 Way ahead of you. I got Carol on it. 127 00:06:13,350 --> 00:06:15,285 She's getting some seat fillers, and, uh ... 128 00:06:15,319 --> 00:06:16,653 and there they are. 129 00:06:16,687 --> 00:06:19,322 Ladies of the DMV, your attention, please. 130 00:06:19,356 --> 00:06:21,424 You're here to celebrate the birthday 131 00:06:21,459 --> 00:06:24,369 of a woman who looks sweet but is meaner than a department 132 00:06:24,370 --> 00:06:28,094 manager when you turn in a 1035-S form without a signature! 133 00:06:28,799 --> 00:06:30,633 Thank you very much, Carol. This is gonna be great. 134 00:06:30,668 --> 00:06:32,702 Oh, you're more than welcome. 135 00:06:35,306 --> 00:06:36,739 Steve, Barry wants to know 136 00:06:36,774 --> 00:06:39,713 why you're wearing the towel on the gay side. 137 00:06:40,845 --> 00:06:43,883 I'm not, okay? How's this? 138 00:06:44,982 --> 00:06:48,618 Barry says he's in, but no rough stuff. 139 00:06:51,522 --> 00:06:55,492 - Jenny? Is that you? - Susan? Oh, my god! 140 00:06:56,827 --> 00:06:58,928 Steve! Look who's here! 141 00:06:58,963 --> 00:07:00,296 Hey! Jenny! 142 00:07:00,331 --> 00:07:01,664 Thank you so much for coming. 143 00:07:01,699 --> 00:07:03,900 Oh, are you kidding? I wouldn't miss it. 144 00:07:03,934 --> 00:07:06,736 Look at us. We survived our Korean childhood. 145 00:07:06,770 --> 00:07:08,471 Yeah, we did! 146 00:07:08,506 --> 00:07:10,740 But you guys are so lucky that you're only half Korean. 147 00:07:10,774 --> 00:07:13,843 - Oh, we're still very Korean. - Yeah. 148 00:07:13,878 --> 00:07:15,879 Oh, come on. Look at those eyes. Those are not Korean eyes. 149 00:07:15,913 --> 00:07:17,914 You look like white people trying to line up a putt. 150 00:07:17,948 --> 00:07:21,417 Our mom more than made up for it. She was pretty brutal. 151 00:07:21,452 --> 00:07:23,887 Well, did your mom ever say anything like this ... 152 00:07:23,921 --> 00:07:26,956 "You practice violin until your fingers bleed, 153 00:07:26,991 --> 00:07:29,792 "then tape up your fingers and practice piano. 154 00:07:29,827 --> 00:07:32,662 Then take them off and practice your cello, you lazy ass"? 155 00:07:33,998 --> 00:07:36,399 No. But she does criticize my haircut. 156 00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:39,035 "Susan, you showing too much face." 157 00:07:39,970 --> 00:07:42,405 Well, when my mom saw my first tattoo, 158 00:07:42,439 --> 00:07:44,407 I was in the doghouse for years. 159 00:07:44,441 --> 00:07:47,343 You do one thing they disapprove of, they shame you with guilt. 160 00:07:47,378 --> 00:07:49,779 No, Steve, I actually lived in a doghouse. 161 00:07:51,315 --> 00:07:54,817 Okay, I think we can all agree that our mothers are insane. 162 00:07:54,852 --> 00:07:57,887 Let's promise each other this Korean craziness stops with us. 163 00:07:57,922 --> 00:08:00,423 I want to put an end to the feud so we can be a family again. 164 00:08:00,457 --> 00:08:01,624 That's why I'm here. 165 00:08:01,659 --> 00:08:04,260 I am gonna super so apologize to your mom. 166 00:08:04,295 --> 00:08:08,932 - I'm gonna bow on everything. - Well, she does love groveling. 167 00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:11,401 She's coming! Everybody, hide! 168 00:08:13,571 --> 00:08:15,805 Surprise! 169 00:08:18,676 --> 00:08:20,777 What?! I had nothing to do with this! 170 00:08:20,811 --> 00:08:22,879 I know. You can't keep a secret from me. 171 00:08:22,913 --> 00:08:26,983 I just needed to hit somebody! I hate surprises! 172 00:08:28,319 --> 00:08:31,688 - Happy birthday, mom. - Did you plan all this for me? 173 00:08:31,722 --> 00:08:33,823 I helped, too. I did the invitations. 174 00:08:33,857 --> 00:08:37,594 - I got the wine and the flowers. - Thank you, Steve. 175 00:08:37,628 --> 00:08:40,463 I also did all the research on Korean birthday traditions 176 00:08:40,497 --> 00:08:43,566 - so your Hwangap would be perfect. - Thank you, Steve. 177 00:08:44,969 --> 00:08:46,402 Okay, everybody! 178 00:08:46,437 --> 00:08:49,072 Happy birthday, Okha! 179 00:08:49,106 --> 00:08:50,907 Ooh, thank you. 180 00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,815 Who are these people? 181 00:08:54,645 --> 00:08:57,046 Look at her. She's having fun. 182 00:08:57,081 --> 00:09:00,383 This could be a very lucky night for me. 183 00:09:00,417 --> 00:09:04,160 I got one cialis left. I'm taking it. 184 00:09:06,323 --> 00:09:08,458 Why does that girl look familiar to me? 185 00:09:08,492 --> 00:09:10,593 Oh, that's Cousin Jenny. I invited her. 186 00:09:10,628 --> 00:09:12,462 What?! Steve, come here. 187 00:09:12,496 --> 00:09:13,997 You asked Sook-Ja's daughter? 188 00:09:14,031 --> 00:09:15,865 Your mother's gonna hit the roof! 189 00:09:15,899 --> 00:09:17,533 Oh, you could have told me 190 00:09:17,568 --> 00:09:20,103 before I took my last boner pill. 191 00:09:20,137 --> 00:09:24,374 - Mom's gonna be fine, dad. - Eh, you say that now. 192 00:09:24,408 --> 00:09:28,111 And tonight, it's just me and... Roy's new pen. 193 00:09:30,714 --> 00:09:33,716 - Is that who I think it is? - Nah, that's nobody. 194 00:09:33,751 --> 00:09:36,786 Come upstairs, honey. Joe Cialis is in town. 195 00:09:36,820 --> 00:09:42,725 That is the devil spawn of my sister! Who invited her?! 196 00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:45,463 I did. If you're gonna blame anybody, blame me. 197 00:09:45,498 --> 00:09:48,566 Susan, what have you done?! 198 00:09:53,210 --> 00:09:55,211 What did you do? 199 00:09:55,246 --> 00:09:58,381 Look who you welcomed into our home ... our blood enemy. 200 00:09:58,636 --> 00:10:00,670 I think you mean "blood relative." 201 00:10:00,704 --> 00:10:04,073 In Korean tradition, it's just like a vampire ... 202 00:10:04,108 --> 00:10:07,543 once you invite it in, only you can ask it to leave. 203 00:10:07,578 --> 00:10:10,587 - Ask it to leave, Steve. - It has a name ... Jenny ... 204 00:10:10,588 --> 00:10:12,248 and she's not going anywhere. 205 00:10:12,282 --> 00:10:15,151 - You're gonna go talk to her. - No, I'm not. 206 00:10:15,185 --> 00:10:16,686 Oh, god. She's coming over here. 207 00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:19,689 Look ... her feet aren't touching the ground. 208 00:10:21,558 --> 00:10:22,992 Happy birthday, Imo. 209 00:10:23,026 --> 00:10:25,595 I brought you some hangul, imported directly from Korea. 210 00:10:25,629 --> 00:10:28,525 Please accept it with all my good wishes. 211 00:10:30,834 --> 00:10:33,202 This is the part where you accept her gift and say something nice. 212 00:10:34,871 --> 00:10:37,973 Please wish your mother a speedy passage to hell. 213 00:10:39,509 --> 00:10:41,744 - Try again. - Okay. 214 00:10:41,778 --> 00:10:44,613 May she choke on her own vomit. 215 00:10:45,649 --> 00:10:47,917 Mom, can I see you for a second? 216 00:10:48,985 --> 00:10:51,287 Mom, that is the rudest thing I've ever seen you do, 217 00:10:51,321 --> 00:10:53,656 and I've seen you put poop in a box and mail it. 218 00:10:53,690 --> 00:10:55,925 She gave you a present and everything. 219 00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:59,195 Oh! This is not a present. It's an insult! 220 00:10:59,229 --> 00:11:01,831 It's hangul! It's like Korean spam! 221 00:11:01,865 --> 00:11:04,133 It's actually worse than spam. 222 00:11:04,167 --> 00:11:07,803 In this country, we wouldn't even feed it to a dog. 223 00:11:07,838 --> 00:11:09,472 Susan, you can take it home. 224 00:11:09,506 --> 00:11:11,640 Look, she's not trying to insult you. 225 00:11:11,675 --> 00:11:13,664 She's like Susan and I. We just want to end 226 00:11:13,665 --> 00:11:15,744 this feud so our family can get together again. 227 00:11:15,779 --> 00:11:18,581 Oh, you stupid boy. 228 00:11:19,816 --> 00:11:21,784 She's not here for my birthday. 229 00:11:21,818 --> 00:11:23,786 She's here to find the heirloom. 230 00:11:23,820 --> 00:11:25,659 - What heirloom? - The monkey plate. 231 00:11:25,694 --> 00:11:27,089 - The monkey plate? - Yes, the monkey plate. 232 00:11:27,124 --> 00:11:28,958 - What the hell's a monkey plate? - It's the heirloom! 233 00:11:30,093 --> 00:11:35,197 My grandmother had a plate that I loved. 234 00:11:35,232 --> 00:11:40,002 And when she died, Sook-Ja knew I wanted that plate. 235 00:11:40,036 --> 00:11:42,204 And instead of just letting me have it, 236 00:11:42,239 --> 00:11:45,107 she buried it with our grandmother. 237 00:11:45,976 --> 00:11:50,679 - So I took it out of her casket. - You broke into her casket? 238 00:11:50,714 --> 00:11:52,581 After I dug it up. 239 00:11:54,317 --> 00:12:00,055 And Sook-Ja has been furious with me ever since because I defied her. 240 00:12:00,090 --> 00:12:01,991 Mom, there's only one way to end this feud ... 241 00:12:02,025 --> 00:12:05,060 - give the plate back. - Never! 242 00:12:05,095 --> 00:12:07,863 That's the one nice memory I have of my grandmother. 243 00:12:07,898 --> 00:12:09,798 Everything all right in here? 244 00:12:09,833 --> 00:12:13,406 No. The kids say I'm a bad person because I dug up my 245 00:12:13,407 --> 00:12:18,554 grandmother's grave and I pried a plate from her cold, dead hands. 246 00:12:18,909 --> 00:12:20,609 Tell them I was right to do it. 247 00:12:20,644 --> 00:12:23,078 - You were right to do it. - Really, dad? 248 00:12:23,113 --> 00:12:26,248 Kid, I just came in here for a quiet place to be with Roy's pen. 249 00:12:26,283 --> 00:12:28,050 Oh! 250 00:12:28,084 --> 00:12:31,921 I know your sister treated you badly, but that's your niece out there. 251 00:12:31,955 --> 00:12:34,590 This is not your finest hour. 252 00:12:34,624 --> 00:12:38,594 So, you all think I should go out there and apologize. 253 00:12:38,628 --> 00:12:39,862 Mm-hmm. 254 00:12:39,896 --> 00:12:43,299 All right. I'll do it. 255 00:12:43,333 --> 00:12:48,003 But this is turning out to be one sucky Hwangap. 256 00:12:48,038 --> 00:12:49,705 Where have you guys been? 257 00:12:49,739 --> 00:12:51,807 Little magical place called Dave and Buster's. 258 00:12:51,841 --> 00:12:54,289 Yeah, they have this photo booth that can combine photos 259 00:12:54,290 --> 00:12:56,779 of each of you and show you what your baby would look like. 260 00:12:57,981 --> 00:13:01,850 Look ... our baby looks like Bruno Mars. 261 00:13:01,885 --> 00:13:04,253 Fine. So you guys have a baby together. 262 00:13:04,287 --> 00:13:08,924 But what's this I have? A new Playstation 4 for Roy? 263 00:13:08,959 --> 00:13:12,595 - Oh, nice! The new one! - Where did you get the money for this? 264 00:13:12,629 --> 00:13:15,563 My neighbor's kid's a very sound sleeper. 265 00:13:16,099 --> 00:13:18,867 After an exciting day like this, you know what I could go for? 266 00:13:18,902 --> 00:13:20,035 Pretzel bites. 267 00:13:20,070 --> 00:13:22,271 - Got it. - On it. 268 00:13:22,305 --> 00:13:24,640 Roy, don't you think that this whole thing 269 00:13:24,674 --> 00:13:27,610 - has gone a little too far? - Not at all. 270 00:13:27,644 --> 00:13:28,744 I'm giving them the experience of a lifetime 271 00:13:28,778 --> 00:13:31,814 with this field pass. I deserve to be catered to. 272 00:13:31,848 --> 00:13:34,850 Well, that's one thing, but you're treating them like slaves. 273 00:13:34,884 --> 00:13:38,510 Yeah, well, what can I say? Reparations are a bitch. 274 00:13:38,822 --> 00:13:42,658 - Seriously, if you need me to go ... - No, no, Jenny, please don't go anywhere. 275 00:13:42,692 --> 00:13:45,227 My mom has something she'd like to say to you. 276 00:13:45,262 --> 00:13:51,000 Jenny, after talking to my family, I realized I was wrong. 277 00:13:51,034 --> 00:13:54,370 I'm sorry for what I did all those years ago. 278 00:13:54,404 --> 00:13:57,106 I want you to give this to your mother. 279 00:13:58,141 --> 00:14:02,077 Oh! It's the monkey plate! And what's this? 280 00:14:02,112 --> 00:14:05,648 Oh. That's something else. 281 00:14:05,682 --> 00:14:09,051 Thank you. This is incredibly generous of you, Imo. 282 00:14:09,085 --> 00:14:14,056 - It's time for this feud to end. - I'm so glad to hear that. 283 00:14:14,090 --> 00:14:16,325 And the sooner I get this plate back to my mom, 284 00:14:16,359 --> 00:14:18,994 the sooner we can all book our Disney family cruise. 285 00:14:19,029 --> 00:14:20,396 - Bye. - Good to see you. 286 00:14:20,430 --> 00:14:22,364 So glad to have our families together again. 287 00:14:22,399 --> 00:14:23,299 Me too. 288 00:14:26,970 --> 00:14:30,806 - I'm very proud of you. - Come here, my babies. 289 00:14:32,709 --> 00:14:35,344 Mom, are ... are you crying? 290 00:14:35,378 --> 00:14:40,883 No, I'm laughing! The plate I just gave her was a fake! 291 00:14:40,917 --> 00:14:42,985 - What?! - That's right. 292 00:14:43,019 --> 00:14:47,156 And now she's taking it home to my va-junt of a sister. 293 00:14:47,190 --> 00:14:49,291 Why would you do that?! 294 00:14:49,326 --> 00:14:50,993 Why do you want this feud to keep going?! 295 00:14:51,027 --> 00:14:54,029 Because I'm right and I'm Korean. 296 00:14:55,432 --> 00:14:58,867 Happy freaking birthday to me! 297 00:15:04,374 --> 00:15:06,358 We couldn't find any pretzel bites, 298 00:15:06,359 --> 00:15:08,243 so we stopped at the gas station. 299 00:15:08,278 --> 00:15:10,445 I got you some brake fluid. 300 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,148 I got you a bathroom key. 301 00:15:13,182 --> 00:15:17,452 Not what I was expecting, but both gifts please me. 302 00:15:17,487 --> 00:15:20,490 You know, Roy, you're really being a jerk, making them run 303 00:15:20,491 --> 00:15:23,392 all over town, fetching you stuff, like two Irish setters. 304 00:15:23,426 --> 00:15:26,261 I don't mind. I'm a dog person. 305 00:15:26,296 --> 00:15:29,231 Hey, this is a hard decision. I only have one of these to give away. 306 00:15:29,265 --> 00:15:31,066 One of these guys is gonna be disappointed. 307 00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:32,634 You need to make a decision. 308 00:15:32,669 --> 00:15:35,170 A good way to do that is ... is play a game. 309 00:15:35,204 --> 00:15:37,472 "Who knows Roy best?" Whoever wins gets to go. 310 00:15:37,507 --> 00:15:40,943 I'm in. Whoever knows him best gets the ticket. 311 00:15:40,977 --> 00:15:42,945 I know Roy best. 312 00:15:42,979 --> 00:15:46,214 When we were 11 years old, we found a Penthouse magazine, 313 00:15:46,249 --> 00:15:48,584 and we shared a very special and exhausting afternoon. 314 00:15:48,618 --> 00:15:51,553 All right. I can roll with that. 315 00:15:51,588 --> 00:15:53,655 I'm gonna ask you a couple of questions about my life. 316 00:15:53,690 --> 00:15:56,592 Whoever gets the most right goes with me to the game. 317 00:15:56,626 --> 00:15:57,926 - Great. - Cool. 318 00:15:57,961 --> 00:15:59,061 What's my favorite color? 319 00:15:59,095 --> 00:16:00,228 - Red. - Yellow. 320 00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:01,229 Mauve. 321 00:16:01,264 --> 00:16:04,533 Right. It complements my skin tone. 322 00:16:04,567 --> 00:16:06,268 We've talked about this. 323 00:16:06,302 --> 00:16:09,004 Okay, I'll make it a little easier. 324 00:16:09,038 --> 00:16:11,974 - What's my favorite food? - Snacks. 325 00:16:12,008 --> 00:16:13,875 - What specifically? - Salty snacks? 326 00:16:13,910 --> 00:16:15,978 - Corn dogs! - This is true. 327 00:16:16,012 --> 00:16:18,447 And he's a slave to the snow cone. 328 00:16:19,482 --> 00:16:21,183 No offense. 329 00:16:21,217 --> 00:16:22,451 Looks like Hank got two right. 330 00:16:22,485 --> 00:16:24,219 Hank's not playing! 331 00:16:24,253 --> 00:16:26,521 You guys said whoever knows him best gets the field pass. 332 00:16:26,556 --> 00:16:28,256 Feel like going to the game, Hank? 333 00:16:28,291 --> 00:16:30,359 I might enjoy such. 334 00:16:30,393 --> 00:16:32,961 You two need to get it together. I don't want to go with him. 335 00:16:32,996 --> 00:16:35,210 I want to go with one of you guys. 336 00:16:35,431 --> 00:16:37,132 Okay, so, forget all the other questions. 337 00:16:37,166 --> 00:16:40,135 Next person to get this question right ... they get the field pass. 338 00:16:40,169 --> 00:16:43,105 Here's a lay-up. What's my favorite movie? 339 00:16:44,273 --> 00:16:47,943 - "The notebook"? - We just watched it yesterday. 340 00:16:47,977 --> 00:16:51,246 - "Sportscenter"? - "Car wash"! 341 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:56,251 He always says he can't decide if he likes the music or the story more. 342 00:16:56,285 --> 00:16:59,655 Ohh! That's right! Hank's going to the game! 343 00:16:59,689 --> 00:17:02,457 - Come on. - Hey, I won! Ha ha! 344 00:17:02,492 --> 00:17:04,459 Hey, it looks like it's me and you, Roy. 345 00:17:04,494 --> 00:17:07,996 Well, this is very exciting. Last time I won something 346 00:17:08,031 --> 00:17:10,565 was a spot on our battalion's firing squad. 347 00:17:12,402 --> 00:17:15,303 Once again, I've revealed too much. 348 00:17:18,574 --> 00:17:20,275 Look at me all you want 349 00:17:20,309 --> 00:17:24,312 with your beady, little disapproving eyes. 350 00:17:24,347 --> 00:17:27,382 - I'm not sorry. - Well, you should be. 351 00:17:27,417 --> 00:17:28,750 I deserve that plate. 352 00:17:28,785 --> 00:17:32,154 It's the one good memory I have of my grandmother, 353 00:17:32,188 --> 00:17:36,291 and that's why I've always kept it right here. 354 00:17:40,063 --> 00:17:41,663 What? 355 00:17:41,698 --> 00:17:44,700 How many other secret hiding compartments are in my bar? 356 00:17:44,734 --> 00:17:47,005 On a need-to-know basis. 357 00:17:48,471 --> 00:17:50,539 Look, I'm sorry you had to go through all that, mom, 358 00:17:50,573 --> 00:17:52,474 but, uh, Susan and I don't want this whole thing 359 00:17:52,508 --> 00:17:54,609 carrying on to the next generation. 360 00:17:54,644 --> 00:17:56,478 Jenny is just like her mother. 361 00:17:56,512 --> 00:17:58,714 No, she's not. She's like Susan and I. 362 00:17:58,748 --> 00:18:00,716 She's not a lunatic, like you two. 363 00:18:00,750 --> 00:18:03,251 Trust me ... you're going to thank me one day 364 00:18:03,286 --> 00:18:06,121 - for getting rid of her. - I doubt it. 365 00:18:06,155 --> 00:18:07,723 You know, it would have been nice to have Jenny over 366 00:18:07,757 --> 00:18:09,725 for the holidays, thanksgiving someday... 367 00:18:09,759 --> 00:18:12,294 you know, one big, happy family. 368 00:18:13,396 --> 00:18:15,997 Why is the jukebox moving? 369 00:18:16,032 --> 00:18:18,533 Daaaaah! Give me the plate, old woman! 370 00:18:20,503 --> 00:18:22,003 Jenny, what's going on here? 371 00:18:22,038 --> 00:18:23,438 I thought we all wanted the same thing. 372 00:18:23,473 --> 00:18:25,040 Shut up, white boy! All I came for was the plate! 373 00:18:26,175 --> 00:18:29,244 - Ok? - See? I knew my sister sent you. 374 00:18:29,278 --> 00:18:31,179 "Oh, happy birthday, Imo. 375 00:18:31,214 --> 00:18:34,449 Here's a can of spam to shove up your ass!" 376 00:18:35,785 --> 00:18:40,322 I came for blood, and I will not stop until I retrieve what I came for! 377 00:18:40,356 --> 00:18:42,290 Blood will answer blood! 378 00:18:43,192 --> 00:18:44,726 Pittsburgh-style! 379 00:18:44,761 --> 00:18:45,794 All right, that's enough! 380 00:18:45,828 --> 00:18:47,395 Quit! Stop! 381 00:18:47,430 --> 00:18:48,597 This ends now! 382 00:18:48,631 --> 00:18:51,233 - Ohh! - Ohh! Steve! 383 00:18:51,267 --> 00:18:54,136 - Why did you do that? - You gave me no choice. 384 00:18:54,170 --> 00:18:56,471 My mother raised me with one mission ... 385 00:18:56,506 --> 00:18:59,074 to bring that monkey plate back to her. 386 00:18:59,108 --> 00:19:02,344 - Now I've disappointed her. - You guys were gonna kill each other. 387 00:19:02,378 --> 00:19:05,495 Oh. Now I've disappointed her twice. 388 00:19:06,749 --> 00:19:10,585 _ 389 00:19:10,620 --> 00:19:12,454 Get your ass outta here. 390 00:19:15,758 --> 00:19:18,226 Oh, I need to hit the hay. 391 00:19:18,261 --> 00:19:21,329 "Hit the hay"? Wait a minute. 392 00:19:21,364 --> 00:19:23,131 That wast the real monkey plate, was it? 393 00:19:23,166 --> 00:19:27,702 Oh, I no speak-a English very well. 394 00:19:27,737 --> 00:19:30,962 Cut the crap. You gave me a fake plate knowing 395 00:19:30,963 --> 00:19:33,521 - I was gonna break it all along. - Yes, because I knew 396 00:19:33,556 --> 00:19:35,343 Jenny would see through the first plate. 397 00:19:35,378 --> 00:19:38,313 I may despise my sister, but I respect her. 398 00:19:38,347 --> 00:19:40,515 She knows how to train a child. 399 00:19:40,550 --> 00:19:44,285 I've spoiled you and your sister with my nurturing. 400 00:19:45,421 --> 00:19:47,823 - So, where's the real plate? - You want to see it? 401 00:19:50,293 --> 00:19:54,362 It's been here for the last 20 years ... 402 00:19:54,397 --> 00:19:57,414 right under Hank's ass. 403 00:19:58,728 --> 00:20:05,667 Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! 404 00:20:06,242 --> 00:20:10,245 Damn. She's too good. 405 00:20:12,915 --> 00:20:15,217 That's not the real plate, either, is it? 406 00:20:15,251 --> 00:20:20,255 I got a box of those. I can do this all night long. 407 00:20:24,737 --> 00:20:27,305 I just saw Jenny get into a windowless van 408 00:20:27,340 --> 00:20:31,109 and speed down the alley. What happened here? 409 00:20:31,143 --> 00:20:33,245 Jenny's not the cousin we were hoping for. 410 00:20:33,279 --> 00:20:34,813 Look, mom, as much as I wanted 411 00:20:34,847 --> 00:20:37,343 to reconnect with the other family, I guess I should 412 00:20:37,344 --> 00:20:39,651 have been pretty grateful for the one I have here. 413 00:20:39,685 --> 00:20:42,888 - That's always been enough for me. - Me too. 414 00:20:42,922 --> 00:20:48,193 Family is about love and compassion and respect for each other. 415 00:20:48,227 --> 00:20:50,829 - And we have that. - That's right, Susan. 416 00:20:50,863 --> 00:20:55,333 Steve, walk your mother up the stairs. 417 00:20:55,368 --> 00:20:56,902 - And, Susan? - Hmm? 418 00:20:56,936 --> 00:20:59,237 Clean up that shit. 419 00:21:01,871 --> 00:21:04,654 sync and correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~